


alive

by Noa



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Android Lil Hal, Gen, M/M, POV Second Person, oops i did it again
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-05
Updated: 2014-07-05
Packaged: 2018-02-07 12:32:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1899162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Noa/pseuds/Noa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The first time you felt his heartbeat, you thought your own would stop.</p>
            </blockquote>





	alive

**Author's Note:**

  * For [gloomyOptimist](https://archiveofourown.org/users/gloomyOptimist/gifts).



The first time you felt his heartbeat, you thought your own would stop. You’d reached out quietly, seconds after his brand new body sprung to life. It wasn’t quite a thunder crack and a hoarse voice yelling ‘It’s alive!’. Instead, it was a dull beat, greeting your palm through Hal’s synthetic skin. Still, the shiver it sent up your spine might as well have been a lightning strike.

Hal had no heart. No _real_ heart, whatever ‘real’ meant. He had a core, though. A shell where all his circuits connected, the bridge between his body and his brain. From this core, signals were sent to his organs, his limbs, his skin. From dancing through the room to the fluttering of his eyelids, if it involved his body, it had to go through his heart. If you thought about it, Hal’s heart was more of a lifeline to him than yours was to you, and that made the steady beat bleeding through his chest special to you in a way you couldn’t really explain.

He’s not trying to hide his frown as he looks down at you. Your hand rests on his makeshift ribs way longer than it should, and he puts two and two together.

“You’ve been walking around with the real thing for your entire life, bro. Don’t see why mine’s all that.”

You shrug. You can feel him studying you from behind his shades. It takes a while before you realize why he’s not looking away. He’s waiting for an answer.

“It’s different.” You end up saying. He frowns at your (bullshit) answer, but you pretend not to see.

Of course it was different. The source of Hal’s rhythm wasn’t pumping blood. It was a simulation, an exaggeration of the pulsing of his core. His heart beat faster or slower when given the corresponding signals. These signals were linked to emotional or physical states _also_ induced by signals, and _those_ signals came from his brain. Hal’s heartbeat was, quite literally, entirely between his ears, and yet-

It was one of the realest things you’ve felt in your life. How it matches the breaths he doesn’t have to take. How it thrums quietly, but never weak. You can’t imagine ever growing tired of it.

But Hal wasn’t made to have that kind of patience.

“Dude.” He says. You quickly pull your hand away.

“Sorry.” You say.

He just looks at you for a moment. At times like this, you regret those few inches he’s got on you (it was a miscalculation on your end. By the time you realized Hal would end up taller, it was too late to shorten the frame).

Then, Hal lifts a hand, and presses it to your sternum. You startle briefly. He stares at the center of your chest like he’s waiting for something to happen. Neither of you say a word.

His touch makes you hyper aware of your own heartbeat, speeding slightly against the soft pressure of Hal’s palm. He looks focused. When his eyes dart up to meet yours, you drop your gaze. His lips part, and you think he might pull away. He doesn’t.

“This is weird as fuck.” He says, and you’re not sure what to say, so you just nod. The two of you stay statue-still, no sound but your (automated) breathing. You just stand there, hand to Hal’s chest and his to yours, creating a stunningly accurate mirror image. (You used to sit in front of a mirror for more serious discussions, so that Hal could see you as you spoke to each other.) He wasn’t a reflection, though. Not anymore.

“I mean,” Hal continues, and you notice he’s lowered his volume. “I’ve felt your pulse before. Just. Not like this.”

“What’s it like.” You ask. “Aside from weird as fuck.”

Normally, this is where he’d snort. This is where you’d both draw back and laugh, finish the checkup and have Cheetos for dinner (well, you would. He would just try to ruin your appetite by listing every single ingredient off the bag). This is where you’d start denying ever having shared a moment as intimate as this. That you _enjoyed_ sharing a moment as intimate as this. You wait for him to withdraw his hand.

He doesn’t. Hal’s face stays straight, and his eyes stay focused. He takes a moment to think; you’re not sure why it makes you feel nervous.

“Warm.” He decides. His gaze flits up to yours, and this time, you don’t turn away. You hope your heartbeat isn’t as loud as it sounds in your ears. His fingertips curl the slightest bit into the fabric of your shirt. You draw a breath, and give a tiny nod of your head.

It does feel warm.

 _Hal_ feels warm. Not like how he used to feel, back when he was confined to shades, when he’d risk overheating by running twenty torrents, or playing three movies at the same time. He felt warm like sunlight on skin, like air around a fire. He felt alive.

And somehow, his hand on your heart made you feel alive too.

_fin_


End file.
